3 answers
Payton
Student
Olathe, Kansas
1
Question
Asked
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Over a year ago, I decided I wanted to care for marine animals, but it requires me moving about 20 hours from home. How do I know that this is the right option? Is there anyway that helped you get past that fear of leaving somewhere you've always known ? #Spring25
I am a high school senior, soon graduating! I have been accepted to a college in Florida that I plan to attend, but I find myself nervous that I may make the wrong decision. I'm seeking guidance from others who have left their homes as well for something they loved.
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3 answers
Ernesto Longhin
Psychologist
10
Answers
Mendoza, Mendoza Province, Argentina
Updated
Ernesto’s Answer
Hi Payton,
First of all, your fear is not unfounded. It is healthy and expected to feel fear and anguish when leaving a familiar place and loved ones to pursue a professional career project that takes you away from the known. It is human and natural to fear moving from "the known" to "the unknown." In this sense, allow me to recommend that you feel free to experience these fears. Allow yourself to experience these fears and talk about them with your trusted loved ones, whether it's your family, friends, a trusted high school teacher, or a school counselor. This will allow you to lower your anxiety levels, and perhaps you will find in what they tell you realistic and valuable information about the decision you want to make.
Second, the only way to verify if you are making the right choice is to go through the experience. This means going to Florida and starting to experience what it's like to study that major.
Sooner or later, something will tell you if it was what you wanted to study or not. If it's something you felt called to or not. Whether you like it or not. Whether you enjoy it or not. Give yourself the time you need to discover it. Trust your instincts! What do you feel happens to you when you're in Florida? What do you feel happens to you when you are in the university building itself? What are you discovering in all these experiences? With the professors, with your study companions, with the university environment. Record what is happening to you. If necessary, write it down; keep a personal diary.
In this life experience, you are irreplaceable, indispensable; no one but you can say what it feels like. Allow yourself to have the experience. Even give yourself permission to fail as well. Discovering perhaps that it wasn't what you thought, that it wasn't what you imagined, that it's not the career for you, is part of the process. We all go through it. Take it as a learning experience. Experience everything with curiosity and also with the prudence of listening to your inner voice that never fails. Our instinct never fails. But I'm afraid you'll have to take that step. And if part of your fears and anxieties are related to being away from your loved ones, perhaps one of them can accompany you during the first part of your experience in Florida so you don't feel alone. Perhaps you have relatives in Florida or nearby who would want or be able to wait for you there. All these last things I suggest are so you can create a kind of "emotional bridge" between what you are leaving and where you are going. It's very concrete and practical, and it will help you dispel all these previous fears (sometimes the mind creates a very big and distorted reality of something, and when we come into contact with the reality itself, we end up realizing that it was more what we imagined than what reality is).
And if it wasn't the right career for you, then you will have discovered with concrete real data that certainly this career wasn't for you, and you can end up incorporating everything as a valuable learning experience. In that case, and only in that case, it will be time to shuffle the cards and start over.
The lessons in life are not just about getting it right, getting it right, and getting it right. They also include making mistakes and failing! (so to speak, since in all learning there is neither right nor wrong, only experience gained!!)
I hope I was able to help you. Cheer up!
Here I am in case you need more advice.
Greetings!
First of all, your fear is not unfounded. It is healthy and expected to feel fear and anguish when leaving a familiar place and loved ones to pursue a professional career project that takes you away from the known. It is human and natural to fear moving from "the known" to "the unknown." In this sense, allow me to recommend that you feel free to experience these fears. Allow yourself to experience these fears and talk about them with your trusted loved ones, whether it's your family, friends, a trusted high school teacher, or a school counselor. This will allow you to lower your anxiety levels, and perhaps you will find in what they tell you realistic and valuable information about the decision you want to make.
Second, the only way to verify if you are making the right choice is to go through the experience. This means going to Florida and starting to experience what it's like to study that major.
Sooner or later, something will tell you if it was what you wanted to study or not. If it's something you felt called to or not. Whether you like it or not. Whether you enjoy it or not. Give yourself the time you need to discover it. Trust your instincts! What do you feel happens to you when you're in Florida? What do you feel happens to you when you are in the university building itself? What are you discovering in all these experiences? With the professors, with your study companions, with the university environment. Record what is happening to you. If necessary, write it down; keep a personal diary.
In this life experience, you are irreplaceable, indispensable; no one but you can say what it feels like. Allow yourself to have the experience. Even give yourself permission to fail as well. Discovering perhaps that it wasn't what you thought, that it wasn't what you imagined, that it's not the career for you, is part of the process. We all go through it. Take it as a learning experience. Experience everything with curiosity and also with the prudence of listening to your inner voice that never fails. Our instinct never fails. But I'm afraid you'll have to take that step. And if part of your fears and anxieties are related to being away from your loved ones, perhaps one of them can accompany you during the first part of your experience in Florida so you don't feel alone. Perhaps you have relatives in Florida or nearby who would want or be able to wait for you there. All these last things I suggest are so you can create a kind of "emotional bridge" between what you are leaving and where you are going. It's very concrete and practical, and it will help you dispel all these previous fears (sometimes the mind creates a very big and distorted reality of something, and when we come into contact with the reality itself, we end up realizing that it was more what we imagined than what reality is).
And if it wasn't the right career for you, then you will have discovered with concrete real data that certainly this career wasn't for you, and you can end up incorporating everything as a valuable learning experience. In that case, and only in that case, it will be time to shuffle the cards and start over.
The lessons in life are not just about getting it right, getting it right, and getting it right. They also include making mistakes and failing! (so to speak, since in all learning there is neither right nor wrong, only experience gained!!)
I hope I was able to help you. Cheer up!
Here I am in case you need more advice.
Greetings!
Kent Falkner
23
Answers
Updated
Kent’s Answer
What a thought-provoking and impactful question! It’s clear that you’ve already put in considerable effort into your reflections. Knowing that your passion lies in caring for marine animals is not just inspiring; it’s a clarity that many people spend a lifetime searching for. That kind of focus is truly rare and incredibly valuable!
When you’re about to make a move that big — physically and emotionally — it’s normal to feel fear. It’s not necessarily a sign that you shouldn’t go; it’s often just your brain reacting to change and uncertainty. Fear shows up whenever you’re standing at the edge of something meaningful.
When I’ve faced big moves or changes, what helped me most was realizing: staying scared and stuck felt worse than taking the leap and figuring things out as I went. Growth doesn’t usually feel cozy — but it’s almost always worth it.
Reconnect to your “why” — remind yourself why you started dreaming about caring for marine animals. The more you stay connected to that purpose, the easier it is to push through fear.
Look at it like a chapter, not a lifetime decision — you aren’t permanently leaving everything you’ve ever known; you’re choosing to start a new chapter. You can visit home, stay connected, and even change course later if you need to.
Shift the fear into curiosity — instead of “what if it’s too hard,” ask “what new part of me might I discover?” Excitement and fear feel very similar in the body — it’s about which story you choose to tell yourself.
Small safety nets help — maybe you find a way to line up a support system in the new place, or you make a plan to check in with family and friends regularly. You’re not going to be “starting from zero” emotionally.
When you’re about to make a move that big — physically and emotionally — it’s normal to feel fear. It’s not necessarily a sign that you shouldn’t go; it’s often just your brain reacting to change and uncertainty. Fear shows up whenever you’re standing at the edge of something meaningful.
When I’ve faced big moves or changes, what helped me most was realizing: staying scared and stuck felt worse than taking the leap and figuring things out as I went. Growth doesn’t usually feel cozy — but it’s almost always worth it.
Kent recommends the following next steps:
Mariem Limam
Solution Management Center Representative
8
Answers
Tunis, Tunisia
Updated
Mariem’s Answer
Hi Payton, :)
I get how scary it can feel to leave everything you’ve always known. When I faced something similar, what helped me was asking myself, “Would I regret not doing this?” If the answer was yes, I knew I had to go for it.
It’s okay to be scared, it just means you’re stepping into something new and exciting. Home will always be there, and you’ll always carry the people and memories with you. If your heart is pulling you toward caring for marine animals, trust that. You’re braver than you feel right now!
I get how scary it can feel to leave everything you’ve always known. When I faced something similar, what helped me was asking myself, “Would I regret not doing this?” If the answer was yes, I knew I had to go for it.
It’s okay to be scared, it just means you’re stepping into something new and exciting. Home will always be there, and you’ll always carry the people and memories with you. If your heart is pulling you toward caring for marine animals, trust that. You’re braver than you feel right now!