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How can I help my little brother, who's in a bad school, succeed academically?

he's doing fine socially, but hw just haven't clicked for him yet. how can I help him when he gets super frustrated?

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Joe’s Answer

I used to have this challenge with my children. I would try to help them, but they would get frustrated, cry or walk away. I decided to start helping them with things they did know how to do well. It was a way to build their confidence, bring a smile and create a little energy in them. Then we would move onto more challenging things a piece at a time. Homework is always going to get more and more challenging each week. The next week builds on the previous one. So I would try to figure out what didn't "stick" previously that is making them frustrated now. At some point with each of them, you would see a light come on in their eyes when you helped them with the missing piece. See if you can find their missing piece with them.
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Chad’s Answer

Without knowing specifics (your brother's age, the school curriculum, teachers, etc.), it may be helpful to not consider that it's a "bad school". For kids, saying a school or teacher or subject, etc. is "bad" may be an easy excuse and give him a reason to not try his best. You may help him understand that every part of life will have it's challenges, and it's how we respond to the challenges that helps us grow. If he has a favorite sport or music artist, you could research how that person overcame challenges in their path to success. You can give him examples from your own life, too!
Also - validating his feelings rather than dismissing them (such as: "it's ok to be frustrated, this would be frustrating for me, too") can help him understand that experiencing feelings are a normal part of school and growing up. It means his brain and body are working. :) Good luck!
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Natalie’s Answer

Hi Ally,

My younger sister and I attended an underachieving school, and it was tough! I was a grade ahead of her and naturally felt it was my duty to protect and guide her, even if the right path wasn't considered cool. I continuously encouraged her and downplayed bad behavior that was popular at the time. It's important to find a way to appeal to your brother's learning style, as everyone learns differently. Be patient, keep your cool.

You are your sibling's role model. Keep trying to connect with him. Do homework together and make it fun and interesting. Try to appeal to your brother, and most importantly, don't give up on him!
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