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What are some challenges that people have to overcome and turn a new leaf?
Some people experience heartbreak or the lost of a loved one, and they have to suffer. But during this period of suffering there is still room for growth. Either through working or pushing yourself to become a better person.
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Cassaundra’s Answer
Almost any sudden miss on an expectation can cause a challenge to work through. You thought you'd have a partner forever, but the relationship failed. You thought you were going to ace a test, but got a C. You assumed family would always be in your life, but they either pass away or perhaps hurt you in a way that the relationship could not recover from. You thought you were doing amazing at a job and get laid off. When your expectations don't match reality, it can lead to suffering (or joy! For example, you thought you were going to get a B on a test, but you get an A).
Expanding on Pătrăşcanu’s answer, self-compassion is a key role in turning a new leaf. Understanding your needs, where you are in your life, what you have on your plate now, and where you want to go and be known as a person are important in growing as an individual.
While people try to avoid it, suffering is something that every human goes through, some more than others. I think of it like a "pain balloon." One person's pain balloon may be very big because they've had a lot of suffering and pain in their life that they've had to heal through. While it can handle a lot, when it's full - it hurts. Another person's pain balloon may be much smaller because they've not had to suffer much yet in their own life. However, when something happens to cause that person to suffer, even if it's less by comparison, it hurts just as much as the other person's because it's full, too. We cannot compare each other's suffering, but we can have compassion and show up for the people around us when their "pain balloon" is full.
We choose to show up each day and do the best we can with partial information, our emotional or physical capacity, and what we've experienced so far in our life. Turning a new leaf is making choices each day that make you healthy and whole, to the best of your ability, and learning from the times when you chose something that hurt you. Beating ourselves up over it won't help, but learning from it will. Sometimes pushing through a hard time will be a good, healthy choice or it may be to avoid feeling the pain and it comes out badly later. That's where the growth can accelerate, as you mention in your post.
Expanding on Pătrăşcanu’s answer, self-compassion is a key role in turning a new leaf. Understanding your needs, where you are in your life, what you have on your plate now, and where you want to go and be known as a person are important in growing as an individual.
While people try to avoid it, suffering is something that every human goes through, some more than others. I think of it like a "pain balloon." One person's pain balloon may be very big because they've had a lot of suffering and pain in their life that they've had to heal through. While it can handle a lot, when it's full - it hurts. Another person's pain balloon may be much smaller because they've not had to suffer much yet in their own life. However, when something happens to cause that person to suffer, even if it's less by comparison, it hurts just as much as the other person's because it's full, too. We cannot compare each other's suffering, but we can have compassion and show up for the people around us when their "pain balloon" is full.
We choose to show up each day and do the best we can with partial information, our emotional or physical capacity, and what we've experienced so far in our life. Turning a new leaf is making choices each day that make you healthy and whole, to the best of your ability, and learning from the times when you chose something that hurt you. Beating ourselves up over it won't help, but learning from it will. Sometimes pushing through a hard time will be a good, healthy choice or it may be to avoid feeling the pain and it comes out badly later. That's where the growth can accelerate, as you mention in your post.