1 answer
Rachel
Student
Muskego, Wisconsin
1
Question
Asked
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What has been the most useful thing for school counselors when making a first impression on their students?
I am currently doing my Practicum at a school and mainly observing what the school counselor does to help students. I sometimes participate and would like to learn more about building rapport with kids/teenagers. It would be interesting to hear different answers as I would like to work in this career in the future!
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1 answer
Chinyere Okafor
Educationist and Counseling Psychologist
1403
Answers
Port Harcourt, Rivers, Nigeria
Updated
Chinyere’s Answer
Hi Rachel,
This is a great question, and it’s something every good school counselor learns over time: the first impression isn’t about saying the “perfect” thing; it’s about how safe and understood you make a student feel in those first moments.
What works best is being calm, genuine, and approachable. Students, especially teenagers, can quickly sense when someone is being overly formal or trying too hard. When you show up as a real person, warm, respectful, and not judgmental, it lowers their guard. Even small things like your tone of voice, body language, and patience matter more than any specific words.
Another key piece is listening more than talking. Many students aren’t used to adults truly listening to them without interrupting or correcting. When they feel heard, even briefly, that builds trust faster than long conversations. It also helps to meet them where they are. Some students will open up quickly, others will be quiet or guarded. Not pushing too hard, but instead giving them space while staying consistent, shows them that you’re someone they can come back to.
Over time, students remember how you made them feel more than what you said. If their first experience with you feels safe, respectful, and pressure-free, you’ve already built the foundation for a strong relationship. You’re already doing the right thing by observing and reflecting like this, that awareness is what will make you effective in this role.
Best wishes!
This is a great question, and it’s something every good school counselor learns over time: the first impression isn’t about saying the “perfect” thing; it’s about how safe and understood you make a student feel in those first moments.
What works best is being calm, genuine, and approachable. Students, especially teenagers, can quickly sense when someone is being overly formal or trying too hard. When you show up as a real person, warm, respectful, and not judgmental, it lowers their guard. Even small things like your tone of voice, body language, and patience matter more than any specific words.
Another key piece is listening more than talking. Many students aren’t used to adults truly listening to them without interrupting or correcting. When they feel heard, even briefly, that builds trust faster than long conversations. It also helps to meet them where they are. Some students will open up quickly, others will be quiet or guarded. Not pushing too hard, but instead giving them space while staying consistent, shows them that you’re someone they can come back to.
Over time, students remember how you made them feel more than what you said. If their first experience with you feels safe, respectful, and pressure-free, you’ve already built the foundation for a strong relationship. You’re already doing the right thing by observing and reflecting like this, that awareness is what will make you effective in this role.
Best wishes!