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What qualities make someone a strong coach, including when it’s an informal role ?
What qualities make someone a strong coach, including when it’s an informal role?
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9 answers
Paul Goetzinger MPA
Academic and Career Advisor | Freelance Writer | TRIO Program Director
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Tacoma, Washington
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Paul’s Answer
I have always emphasized the Wooden Pyramid of Success, when it comes to mentoring and coaching individuals around me.
I truly believe that a good coach helps their mentee's realize their full potential by teaching them to be their best selves through specific instruction, demonstration, and repetition, not just by focusing on winning at all costs or controlling others.
I have always felt that managers are doing a disservice to their organization, society, and most of all, themselves, by attempting to control everything and holding others around them back. If they hold others back then success will be limited and the person, who they are coaching, will only utilize a small percentage of their natural talents and skills.
I also feel that other qualities include the ability to provide constructive correction without causing resentment, building trust, cultivating self-discipline in their organization, and demonstrating integrity.
I believe that a strong coach is one who is able to encourage overcoming adversity. I know that many of us might fear adversity, or feel that is a setback or a failure. But, the fact is that failure is only temporary, and adversity is one of the best methods, that I know, that teaches valuable lessons, and enables us to become a stronger and more talented employee. A good coach helps their subordinates view failure as a required part of growth, rather than something to be feared.
Leading by example, is also an important element. A coach, or supervisors, actions and character serve as the primary teaching tool for their organization. I have known individuals, who have had questionable ethics, and ultimately been terrible examples for employees and subordinates. Organizations will be challenged to survive, if good examples are not set by those in charge of maintaining them. A coach without character or integrity has no place in an organization. If these characteristics do not exist, it will ultimately collapse and fail.
I truly believe that a good coach helps their mentee's realize their full potential by teaching them to be their best selves through specific instruction, demonstration, and repetition, not just by focusing on winning at all costs or controlling others.
I have always felt that managers are doing a disservice to their organization, society, and most of all, themselves, by attempting to control everything and holding others around them back. If they hold others back then success will be limited and the person, who they are coaching, will only utilize a small percentage of their natural talents and skills.
I also feel that other qualities include the ability to provide constructive correction without causing resentment, building trust, cultivating self-discipline in their organization, and demonstrating integrity.
I believe that a strong coach is one who is able to encourage overcoming adversity. I know that many of us might fear adversity, or feel that is a setback or a failure. But, the fact is that failure is only temporary, and adversity is one of the best methods, that I know, that teaches valuable lessons, and enables us to become a stronger and more talented employee. A good coach helps their subordinates view failure as a required part of growth, rather than something to be feared.
Leading by example, is also an important element. A coach, or supervisors, actions and character serve as the primary teaching tool for their organization. I have known individuals, who have had questionable ethics, and ultimately been terrible examples for employees and subordinates. Organizations will be challenged to survive, if good examples are not set by those in charge of maintaining them. A coach without character or integrity has no place in an organization. If these characteristics do not exist, it will ultimately collapse and fail.
Updated
RikSan’s Answer
Being a good coach starts with empathy and a genuine willingness to put yourself in someone else’s shoes. That foundation is reinforced by strong listening skills—listening not just to respond, but to truly understand what the person needs in that moment. Sometimes they are looking for specific advice; other times they may need encouragement, perspective, or simply a safe space to think through an issue aloud.
Effective coaching also requires self‑awareness and the ability to thoughtfully reflect on your own experiences. Drawing on past lessons allows you to share relevant insights and offer practical guidance without imposing solutions. In both formal and informal coaching situations, it’s important to balance this by staying focused on the other person’s goals and context.
Finally, being a strong coach means consistently demonstrating care and building trust over time. By creating an environment of familiarity, psychological safety, and respect, you make it easier for people to seek you out, be open about challenges, and engage honestly. That sense of safety is what ultimately makes coaching—especially informal coaching—meaningful and effective.
Effective coaching also requires self‑awareness and the ability to thoughtfully reflect on your own experiences. Drawing on past lessons allows you to share relevant insights and offer practical guidance without imposing solutions. In both formal and informal coaching situations, it’s important to balance this by staying focused on the other person’s goals and context.
Finally, being a strong coach means consistently demonstrating care and building trust over time. By creating an environment of familiarity, psychological safety, and respect, you make it easier for people to seek you out, be open about challenges, and engage honestly. That sense of safety is what ultimately makes coaching—especially informal coaching—meaningful and effective.
Updated
Pam’s Answer
The best coaches help people grow while making them feel supported, not judged. Active listening is a core quality. It is important that you are truly hearing their concerns. Make sure to ask thoughtful questions and do not think you can fix everything. It is also important to show empathy. In addition to empathy, you need to show you are trustworthy by keeping things confidential. A quality I love from an informal coach is when they follow up with me to see how things are going vs me reaching out. It shows they are thinking of me and care about me as an individual.
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Katie’s Answer
Being a good coach involves several important qualities and a strong commitment to those you're guiding. It's essential that you be encouraging, honest, transparent, and empathetic. Coaches and teachers have a huge impact on those they're mentoring. It's a rewarding career path!
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Michael’s Answer
A strong coach is a servant leader. Be willing to lead by example and do the dirty work you expect from your team. This creates buy-in. Buy-in unlocks a coach's ability to teach a team member due to the earned respect. Being open, caring, a great listener are all qualities that a servant leader and great coach exemplify.
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Jessica’s Answer
A strong coach—formal or informal—shows empathy, listens actively, and builds trust by being approachable and consistent. They ask thoughtful questions that guide reflection rather than giving direct answers, helping others grow through their own insights. Great coaches also observe carefully, give timely and constructive feedback, and celebrate progress, not just outcomes. Even in informal roles, their influence comes from modeling curiosity, patience, and belief in others’ potential.
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Shannon’s Answer
Hi! I think the definition of a strong coach can really vary depending on what the coachee is looking for. Are they seeking advice, guidance, or more of an ongoing coach or mentor relationship? A strong coach should take the time to understand and align on that type of support before diving in.
It’s also important to note that these needs can change over time, and an effective coaching relationship allows space for that evolution.
It’s also important to note that these needs can change over time, and an effective coaching relationship allows space for that evolution.
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Jason’s Answer
To provide effective coaching, you need three key things: time and ability to support the person, real care and empathy for them, and experience or credibility that matters to them. If any of these are missing, it can affect the quality of the coaching. When all these elements work together, it can create a meaningful and potentially life-changing coaching experience.
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Tian’s Answer
Strong coaches listen first, genuinely care about your growth, and give honest, encouraging feedback.
Even in informal roles, showing up consistently and taking a genuine interest in someone’s development are what build trust. Trust is fundamental in any good coaching relationship. Without it, coaching is just advice; though with it, coaching actually works.
Even in informal roles, showing up consistently and taking a genuine interest in someone’s development are what build trust. Trust is fundamental in any good coaching relationship. Without it, coaching is just advice; though with it, coaching actually works.