Brigitte
What happens if you're college roomate isn't the best?
Next year I am going to be a college freshman and have some (...okay, a lot) of anxieties related to the college process. One of my troubles is the unknown nature of a future roommate. I've had a roommate: my little sister, for the past 10 years. But I don't think that it will be in the same environment. Any advice? #college-advice #student #college
7 answers
Rachael Fassnacht
Rachael’s Answer
Hi Brigitee,
Similarly, I had a lot of anxiety regarding my college roommate. I was paired with 2 random roommates (who chose one another) and got along with both very well. The following year I attended a roommate mixer where I found an additional 4 random roommates (sophomore housing was a suite of 6) who I ended up living with the following 3 years. The college or university you choose will make you fill out a housing survey in which you explain your living preferences (e.g. early riser or late? tidy or messy? loud or quiet? sociable or quiet?). Answering these questions openly and honestly will ensure you are paired with someone compatible to your lifestyle. I would even suggest having your sister weigh in on your initial answers since she knows how you are to live with. I think the fact that you are used to having a roommate already has greatly prepared you. One thing to remember, you don't necessarily have to be best friends with your roommate. As long as you can coincide with one another amicably. That said, they're a great first friend to have! Additionally, college is a whole new experience. Your schedule will be different, your friends will change, and you may make some new discoveries about yourself so keep and open mind when it comes to your roommate, mine are now life long friends I never thought I'd have. One other note-there might be a social media page or opportunity during an open house or orientation where you may meet a peer you could room with, going in with a predetermined roommate you know you'd live with well is also an option.
Best of luck.
Estelle Archer
Estelle’s Answer
Try to get along. Don't look for small, petty things to get upset about. From the beginning, don't try to get your way with the bed or closet preference, because it doesn't really matter. What is most important is being kind and flexible. Good luck!
Rachel Weinheimer
Rachel’s Answer
anjali kv
anjali’s Answer
You lose you confidence, also will miss all the fun that takes place in hostels. Will feel bored
Ella Melzer
Ella’s Answer
My sister had this same anxiety when she was applying! As it turns out there are many ways to talk to you roommate before the big move in day! You can talk about what types of people you both are and potentially set up boundaries/ build a friendship before you even get there! Typically what happens is that you will fill out a form with your habits and interests, and they will pair you with someone who also has those same interests and habits as you. Then you can get into contact with that person! If in the end it REALLY does not work out then you can apply to have a swap made through your Resident Advisor.
Ryan Gacerez
Ryan’s Answer
Hi Brigitte,
Your anxiety is very normal! You are about to embark on a new chapter in your life and and great change is often accompanied by some anxiety. Colleges usually have you fill out some sort of questionnaire so find you the best roommate. Be sure to answer it openly and honestly! Try to set aside some time to connect with your future roommate. Social media is a great place to start especially if you both live far from each other.
If for some reason things don't workout with your roommate, your Resident Advisor will be able to assist. Don't worry! This happens more often than you think. My younger sister needed to get a new roommate during her time in college. She was scared of being perceived in a negative light. But if you maintain open lines of communication while being respectful, everything will workout.
Whenever I have a new roommate, I always find it best to set some sort of rules and boundaries so that both parties can feel right at home.
Richard A.
Richard’s Answer
Even if you aren't best friends with your roommate, it is possible to be on good terms with them and avoid any problems. Whatever you do though, your attitude is the most important in determining your relationship with your roommate. You can always make an effort to forgive and forget as well as helping them out.