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what should i do with my future ?

I graduated from high school in Thailand and moved to Germany almost two years ago I studied German for about 6-7 months. now I do ausbildung as a dentist's assistant. Ausbildung is a vocational training program in Germany. I've been doing it for 5 months now. The problem is that the language is difficult for me. In my opinion, l´d rather study at university but my german stepfather said it was too difficult for me. he said let do ausbildung instead. so should I go back to my hometown or keep going with ausbildung. Thank you

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Owen’s Answer

Hi Praewa, as a person with Asian heritage myself working in Germany, I can only stress the importance to master the German language, if you plan to stay here.

If you are ready for the academic path, going to a university may give you a bit more time to learn the language further - before, during and after class.

There are a lot of resources to improve your German - affordable courses at Volkshochschule, online e.g. DW, even on social media if you use it etc.

Good luck!
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James Constantine’s Answer

Hello Praewa,

Reflecting on Your Current Circumstances

It's crucial to take a good look at your present circumstances, particularly the language difficulties you're encountering in your dental assistant training. If you feel the language barrier is significantly impeding your progress, it might be time to consider alternative paths.

Considering the Possibility of Going Back Home

Going back home could be a feasible choice, particularly if you believe that pursuing higher education in Thailand would be more suitable for you. However, don't forget to weigh the potential advantages of finishing your training in Germany. This could provide you with invaluable work experience, enhance your German language proficiency, and possibly pave the way for future prospects in Germany.

Exploring the University Route

If you're contemplating the university route, it's essential to research the prerequisites and ascertain if your secondary education and German language abilities would suffice. It could also be helpful to consult with an academic advisor or career counselor to gain a clearer picture of what this path might entail for you.

Valuing Other People's Opinions

While it's vital to heed the counsel of others, like your stepfather, the final call on your future lies with you. It's important to balance the advantages and disadvantages of each choice and make a decision that resonates with your ambitions and dreams.

Anticipating Potential Hurdles

No matter which path you choose, expect to face challenges. However, with tenacity, dedication, and a readiness to learn, you can surmount these hurdles and realize your objectives.

In summary, it's crucial to thoroughly evaluate your options and make a decision that aligns with your personal ambitions and dreams. Whether you decide to persist with your training, return home to attend university, or explore different avenues, remember that each path has its unique set of challenges and opportunities.

MAY GOD GUIDE YOU!
James Constantine Frangos.
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Kim’s Answer

Praewa,

Lots of hidden issues in this question!

Who do you live with and who supports you? If you choose to quit the vocational training program in Germany, will they still support you? If you decide to go to University, who will pay for it? Is it possible that your stepfather is unable to support you if you go to university, but is too ashamed to say so, so instead he says you will not do well there? By going back to your hometown, are you referring to a city in Germany, or in Thailand? If you go back to Thailand, do you have family there who will help you get started in life? Where do you want to live?

You mentioned that German language being too hard as a reason for wanting to quit the training program. You will encounter things much more difficult than that in university! There are valid reasons for quitting something, then, there are "Excuses." If you quit, make sure you know the real reason you are doing so. Perhaps dentistry really isn't your thing? If so, that's okay!

I encourage you to consider all the questions I've raised, and, make a plan. This will involve having mature discussions with the adults in your life, so you know who you can count on, and what they can do to assist you. If there is a counselor tied to the vocational program, perhaps discuss it with them as well.

Best of luck!
Kim
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Karin’s Answer

Hi Praewa,

Your decision depends on so many factors, and I feel like I don't have enough information about your situation.

You said you have a German stepfather. Is he living with your mom? Are they both in Germany? Are you living with them?

What is your immigration status? Have you got German citizenship, or are you planning to get it? Do you need to stay in some kind of employment or education setting to be able to stay?

If you would go back to Thailand, where would you go? Do you still have family there who could help you? Could you go to university in Thailand?

6 to 7 month to learn a new language is not very much. Do you have trouble with the actual job training or with the "Berufsschule"? Are you getting support with the language?

Do you like your "Ausbildung" in general, apart from the language issues? Is your salary from the "Ausbildung" enough to support yourself? If you like it in general, I would maybe give it a little more time as your German will be improving. You could be employed in 3 years. If at that point you still want to go to university you can still do that.

If you plan to go to university in Germany, you would have even more trouble with the language. But, of course, you will get better along the way.

What would you want to study if you went to university? Would you qualify to study in Germany? If you had citizenship you could get "Bafoeg". If you don't have citizenship, you need to look for scholarships.

I would recommend that you only throw in the towel on your "Ausbildung" if you have a solid plan in place what you want to do instead.

Consider your interests and talents and figure out what you would like to study if you want to go to university.

Read up on your eligibility to study in Germany if that's what you would like to do. Contact some universities you might consider. If possible, visit and get some advice. There is a general "Studienberatung", but it would probably be more useful to go to the department you are interested in directly and chat to them.

Check the same for Thailand if that's what you want to do.

Read up on scholarships that you would qualify for. First stop: Every university has an International Office where they help foreign students who come to Germany and German students who go abroad. Also check the DAAD for scholarships:
https://www.daad.de/en/

Added, some information on studying in Germany:

https://housinganywhere.com/Germany/study-abroad-germany

https://www.topuniversities.com/where-to-study/europe/germany/how-apply-study-germany

https://www.mygermanuniversity.com/

https://www.study.eu/article/study-in-germany-for-free-what-you-need-to-know

Good luck!

KP
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Michelle’s Answer

Hello, Praewa !

The choice between continuing with Ausbildung in Germany or moving back to Tailand to go to University is certainly a difficult choice. The barrier and difficulty seems to be in a lack of support system from your step father as you've mentioned. It's difficult for me to actually tell you what to do because so many factors can be involved and it may end up being a choice you make based on what is doable for your current circumstances. Is your step father paying for the Ausbildung course of study ? How does your mother feel about you moving back to Thailand to go to university. This is a true lesson in how important a strong support system is when embarking on a career choice.

Let's say that you complete the Ausbildung in Germany and do not quite succeed as your step father would have liked. Perhaps conversation with him about your dissatisfaction may help or not. It is difficult to learn a new language regardless of whatever your first language is and than to engage in a professional course of study in a subject can be quite stressful. You need to explain this to him often. Hopefully, he may come around. Find out the reasons why he wants you to continue with it and not go back to your country. And maybe you can do that but this just isn't the right time.

I know that a career counselor could probably help you with one on one discussion about this. See if there is one you could visit in person and get additional advice and guidance. The Harvard Business Review has an article that discusses how parent approval is universal and I have left a link for it below. The Personal Excellence website also has a good article about when parents don't support your goals. The link for it is below.

Time will give you the answer to the question you have asked. I believe that you are realistically logical about your experience and I do hope that things change in your favor.

Michelle recommends the following next steps:

PARENT DISAPPROVAL OF CAREER GOALS https://hbr.org/2020/09/dont-let-your-parents-disapproval-derail-your-dreams
WHEN PARENTS DON'T SUPPORT YOUR GOALS https://personalexcellence.co/blog/unsupportive-parents/
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