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How do I adjust how I tell my story depending on who I’m talking to and the moment I’m in? ?

How do I adjust how I tell my story depending on who I’m talking to and the moment I’m in?

business communication professional-development storytelling
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Rick’s Answer

Sorry, I don’t know your name, but I do understand where you’re coming from because this is an important life skill every young person should learn early.

One thing I discovered over many years in business is that the core of your story should always remain truthful and authentic, but the parts you emphasize may change depending on who you are speaking with and what matters most to them.

For example, if you are interviewing for a job, the listener may care most about your responsibility, work ethic, and accomplishments. If you are networking with someone in a creative field, they may care more about your passion, ideas, and personality. If you are speaking with a mentor, they may be more interested in your goals, struggles, and willingness to learn.

That doesn’t mean you are being fake. It means you are learning how to communicate effectively.

I spent many years in the investment business before becoming a screenwriter, and I learned that successful communication is often about understanding your audience. Different people connect with different parts of your journey.

The important thing is to always stay genuine. Never invent a story to impress people. Instead, learn how to present the parts of your real story that are most meaningful for that particular moment and conversation.

Over time, you’ll become more comfortable adjusting your communication naturally while still being completely yourself.
Rick
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Needhi’s Answer

Hi!

This is a great question and an important skill to develop. The best approach is to start by connecting with yourself and understanding your story, image, and how you want to present yourself. Next, get to know your audience, their personality, interests, and overall vibe. Based on this, you can adjust your story to better resonate with them. A helpful tip is to find something in common with your audience, which helps you stand out and be memorable. If you know who your audience will be in advance, you can do some research, such as checking their LinkedIn profiles to learn about their education, major, and extracurricular interests, and look for shared connections.

I hope this was helpful!!
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Amy’s Answer

I agree with the previous answers. Your story stays the same, but how you tell it changes depending on your audience. At Deloitte, we created a system called Business Chemistry, based on years of research on human behavior. It identifies four main characteristics: Driver, Integrator, Guardian, and Pioneer. Everyone has all four, but one is usually more dominant. For example, I'm a Pioneer first and an Integrator second, meaning I love brainstorming big ideas with others and value relationships. When telling your story to someone like me, focus on emotions and big ideas. Here are the four main characteristics and how they influence communication:

Drivers: They enjoy challenges and creating momentum. They are logical, technical, and focused on achievements rather than relationships.

Integrators: They value connection and teamwork. They are diplomatic, empathetic, and care about others' feelings, but aren't usually technical.

Guardians: They seek stability and bring order. They are practical, detail-oriented, and prefer a structured approach. They are reserved and appreciate silence for thinking.

Pioneers: They thrive on possibilities and creativity. They are imaginative, adaptable, and enjoy taking risks. They focus on the big picture and are quick to make decisions. They dislike structure that limits creativity.
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Logan’s Answer

Hi! I'll keep it short and sweet. Your audience is key. Your teacher, peers, family, strangers, Starbucks Barista, everyone holds a different role/interests. If you keep in mind the role of those you are talking to, it becomes easier to adapt the story. If I know the person I am talking to likes sports, I can talk about a sports reference or ask specific questions about that topic. People are infinite pools of information. When in doubt, asking a question and learning more about them can help you craft your story so that they are interested. I hope this helps. Keep asking these questions and feel free to reach out if you have any other thoughts.
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Lisa’s Answer

When I meet someone new, I try to connect them to people I already know. For instance, my dad is an engineer, so if I'm talking to another engineer, I might be more direct and ask questions like I do with him. My mom is an artist, so with another artist, I might tell stories and show more emotion, like I do with her. This approach doesn't always work perfectly because everyone is different, but it's a good starting point. Then, I watch how they react and adjust accordingly.
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Dana’s Answer

That's a fantastic question! Here are two helpful points to add to the great advice you've already received. First, be true to yourself. Don't change too much based on who you're talking to. However, it's important to consider who you're interacting with and what you need to communicate. Some people, for instance, have shorter attention spans, so long stories might not be effective. Second, it's crucial to understand your audience. Know your main topic well, but also be flexible in how you engage with them. Asking questions early on can be very beneficial.
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Marty’s Answer

Knowing your audience is essential to presentation - you don't want to use a reference that's outdated or inappropriate and have it land on deaf ears. You'll want to do some digging to make sure you know who you're speaking to and check your language against what you find about your audience.
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Kevin’s Answer

To adjust how you tell your story, you first need to understand who you’re talking to and what you want them to take away from it. Different audiences care about different things, so the parts of your story you emphasize should match the moment and the message. The core of your story can stay the same, but the way you frame it should change depending on your audience. It is also important to take advantage of any public speaking opportunities instead of shying away, because that helps you practice and build confidence. Do not be scared to practice in front of the mirror, since that can help you become more comfortable with how you present yourself. When you are clear on who they are and what you want them to understand, your story becomes much more effective.
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Ashli’s Answer

Hello! When crafting your story, aim for a clear beginning, middle, and end that everyone can enjoy. Show how and why things changed in your story. Include something that helps your audience connect emotionally. Think of your story in three parts: takeoff, turbulence, and touchdown. The takeoff is how you start, the turbulence is the challenge, and the touchdown wraps it up. Get good at these, and you'll be ready to engage any audience. Keep going—you've got this!
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Skyler’s Answer

Great question. I recommend you first listen and understand who you are telling the story to. Understand what their likes/dislikes are in the context of what they are looking for and how they prefer to communicate and be communicated with. Then you can effectively tailor your story to make sure it is achieving what both they and you are looking for. It may be helpful to also learn your audiences business chemistry. This can inform how you frame your story to land well.
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Jezlea’s Answer

Hi! I think first it is important to remember who your audience is. Are they a teacher, student, technology professional, consultant, art professional, etc.? You want to adjust your language and the experience/parts of your story you share based on the individual you are trying to describe yourself to. The best way to highlight yourself is to highlight the parts that are relevant. Secondly, remember that telling your story is a conversation between you and the other person. You want to show that you care about the other person's story and words too and are not just simply there to talk about yourself or request something for them.
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Andrew’s Answer

Hello! I agree with all of these points, but I want to emphasize the value of preparing in advance. It may feel unnatural to plan talking points ahead of time or research the person you’ll be speaking with, but these steps can help reduce the stress of public speaking while also demonstrating your knowledge of the topic.

I highly recommend using Google or LinkedIn to learn more about the person you’ll be speaking with. Based on that research, prepare two or three thoughtful questions you can ask during the conversation. Keeping these questions in your back pocket can help keep the discussion engaging and show that you are genuinely interested.
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Bob’s Answer

I learned over time the value of having a pre-planned brief story at the ready. Business associates commonly call this an "elevator story". What can you say, in roughly 45 seconds, to briefly offer positive insights into or enhance the perception of others into your belief system. It focuses upon what you say during an elevator ride.
Normally, you will meet someone you know, you want to know or you want to impress (boss). Also, normally you may be asked how you are doing, how your day is going or you may simply offer a comment for introduction. This brief interlude must be tailored to the interests of the other person in the elevator.
Example One-
(you) What a day. (Other person) What happened? 'I just received the best comments from a customer. The Vice President of XYZ told me that the support we were offering to her, was the best she as a customer has ever received.
(other person). That's great what made the difference? (you) can fill in the blanks here.
Example Two-
(you) What an exciting morning. (Other person) What happened? (you) My team just completed our new product final test, and the results are very encouraging. (other person) What results? (you) (fill in the blanks here.
Simply think of ways to begin a brief discussion that will then elicit a clarification from the other person(s) on an elevator. Choose different discussion topics that will appeal to the other person who will want to clarify your initial statement.
Example Three--
(you) I was just thinking about you. (other) I hope it was something positive. (you). Yes, I was thinking of the way you managed to lead your team to success on the new sales program. How did you do it (other) Thanks! We were able to ---------- fill in the blanks.
In the third example, you are offering the other person an opportunity to respond to your comment. At the same time, you are adding them to your network of folks you want to maintain contact with.
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