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How do you manage relationships with contacts you gain after networking?

Talking and managing relationships is overwhelming for me, sometimes I take days to respond to a text or voicemail. I just don't want to be seen as rude

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Eddy’s Answer

Exploring relationships within the cybersecurity sector is an exhilarating and crucial aspect of your career path. Even if managing these connections seems daunting occasionally, remember that forging robust relationships is a journey that requires patience and commitment. Kickstart your journey by genuinely expressing your enthusiasm for cybersecurity and engaging with like-minded individuals. It's perfectly fine if you take a few days to reply to messages—being open about your communication habits helps establish mutual understanding.

As you interact with professionals in the cybersecurity realm, concentrate on the positive difference you can bring to each exchange. Share your knowledge, gain wisdom from others, and actively participate in the cybersecurity community. By adding value to discussions and staying true to your cybersecurity skills, your connections will naturally deepen. Seize the learning opportunities within each dialogue, take pride in your accomplishments, and relish the process of nurturing significant relationships in the dynamic and constantly evolving cybersecurity field.
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Holly’s Answer

I completely understand your question, as it's something I've been focusing on recently.

Here's how I've made networking less daunting and more rewarding for myself:

1. I view networking as a way to form relationships. This perspective makes networking enjoyable for me. I don't aim to connect with people solely for the purpose of securing a job, but rather to gain new knowledge. This mindset shift has eased my nerves and, surprisingly, has led to numerous opportunities. Whenever a networking interaction doesn't feel right, I question why. Am I struggling to find the right words? Am I trying to impress them? Am I solely seeking a job from them without really getting to know them?

2. When engaging in networking conversations, I have a clear objective about what I want to learn from the person. I steer clear of generic questions that I could easily find answers to online (e.g., "What's a typical day in your job like?"). Instead, I plan my interactions around a specific, personalized learning goal. For instance, if someone holds a position I aspire to, I might ask how my expertise in a particular area applies to their role. If I'm considering changing industries, I'll seek out someone who's made a similar move and ask about their approach. I don't just connect with people for the sake of ticking a box; I take a moment to consider WHY I want to connect and what insights they could offer me.

3. Holidays are a fantastic opportunity to maintain relationships with networking contacts. This past Thanksgiving, for example, I sent a simple message to my contacts: "Happy Thanksgiving, thank you for taking the time to chat with me this year, and I hope you're doing well". I strive to avoid transactional networking, and I believe a friendly, casual approach can make a big difference.

It's worth noting that most of my networking has been done via LinkedIn, which I find more accessible for introverts than in-person networking events.

Best of luck!
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Aytek’s Answer

These are great answers!

Here are a couple of additional ideas to consider:

1) If a response takes less than a minute, consider doing it at that moment (versus postponing it).

2) Prioritize who you want to stay in touch with. Be candid with yourself, and don't stress about responding to everyone.

3) (If applicable) Mulitask for the postponed actions. If you exercise on a machine, can you respond to some of these then? Or can you do it while resting?

I hope this helps!
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Koka’s Answer

Reflect on why it takes you a while to respond. Do you struggle with time management? Do you have social anxiety? Are you unsure of the proper response? Perhaps the medium (texting) isn't your preferred method of communication. Once you narrow down possible reasons for being slow to respond, you can work on your communication skills.
Possible ways to improve:
If time management is your challenge, try planning a time of the day to respond. Block off 15 minutes on your calendar to respond to your messages.
If you are anxious about interacting with others, even via text, seek out a therapist who specializes in social anxiety, and/or practice exercises to develop coping skills.
If you are unsure how to respond, set aside time to focus on your messages, think about what is being said, and determine what type of response is required. Acknowledgement? A meeting? Sympathy? Answers? If you are unsure how to interpret the message, ask for clarification.
If you prefer to email, talk over the phone, or meet in person, respond with a message such as "I think this requires a detailed response. Can I have your email address?" Or "Can I give you a call to talk about it?" Or "Are you free next week to meet for coffee?"
Hopefully these suggestions help. You clearly recognize the value of maintaining relationships. And remember: No one expects you to be perfect. Just be yourself.
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Ola’s Answer

Maintaining relationships with contacts gained through networking involves regular communication and thoughtful engagement. Here are some tips:

1. **Regular Follow-Up:** Reach out periodically with updates or just to check in. This could be through emails, calls, or even social media.

2. **Provide Value:** Offer assistance, share relevant information, or connect them with resources that might be beneficial to them. Providing value strengthens relationships.

3. **Attend Events:** If possible, attend events or gatherings where you can meet your contacts in person. Face-to-face interactions can deepen connections.

4. **Listen Actively:** When communicating, listen attentively to understand their needs and interests. Show genuine interest in what they are doing.

5. **Remember Details:** Take note of important details about your contacts, such as their projects, achievements, or personal milestones. This demonstrates that you care and are invested in their success.

6. **Be Responsive:** Respond promptly to emails or messages. Being responsive shows that you value and respect their time.

7. **Social Media Engagement:** Engage with your contacts on social media platforms. Like, comment, and share their content to stay connected.

8. **Express Gratitude:** Express appreciation for their support or any opportunities they've provided. Gratitude goes a long way in building strong relationships.

Remember, successful networking is not just about what you can gain but also about building mutually beneficial relationships.
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Jamie’s Answer

I think the first thing I have to say is this...cut yourself some slack. Take a breath, no seriously; take a breath. Give yourself some grace. And don't let your internal dialog lead to self-sabotage. No one is sitting there with a stop watch to time you on when you follow up. Having said that, I would advise giving yourself a couple of days..but no more than that. Set a reminder if you have to. I also like the previous responder who advised sending a message to acknowledge someone and let them know you will get back later if that is what you need.

Fostering relationships with anyone..friends, family, professional network all require the same thing...putting in the time. Start with something simple, maybe comment how much you appreciate getting the opportunity to meet someone new. You've got this! Don't let your inside dialog make you over think.
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Atul’s Answer

Maintaining relationships is as vital as getting a good night's sleep or having a hearty meal. It's a task that demands effort and time, but remember, nothing in life comes easy.

Here's a simple tip: if you find yourself unable to respond immediately, a quick email acknowledging that you've received the voicemail or message and will reply soon can work wonders.

Regular communication and nurturing connections are key to managing your career and paving the way for progress.

While not everyone practices this, those who do often find themselves leading successful, content, and prosperous lives. It might sound a bit cliché, but it's an undeniable truth of life.
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Karen’s Answer

Great that you are aware of the importance of maintaining contacts. One idea would be to plan (put on your calendar) five minutes each day when you will send out those texts or emails. Keep them short. Just let folks know you appreciate knowing them and any time they have spent with you.

With every good wish!
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Sean’s Answer

Maintain your connection with them by arranging regular meet-ups, perhaps once a month, for a casual coffee or lunch date. If face-to-face meetings are not feasible, a virtual gathering can be equally beneficial. Remember, it's crucial that you take the initiative to keep the relationship alive.
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Cooper’s Answer

My answer here will differ slightly from the others. I think it ultimately depends on how valuable those connections are to you. Are they someone that could possibly lead you to an opportunity? Are they just someone that shares mutual interests/groups? Their "value" to you (or mutual value) will have significant impact on how you keep up with them.

On that note, I've found that simply connecting with someone on LinkedIn and engaging with their posts is perfectly fine to "maintain" that relationship. For those that I've seen as people that could help me further my career - whether through professional experience or serving as a bridge or reference to someone else - I might meet them for coffee or ask them to do a 30-minute call if need be.

As the others responses noted above, it's not a reasonable expectation to maintain high-level connections with all of your contacts. Identify your professional priorities, even if it's a general sentiment, and see how these folks can possibly help you along your journey. Ultimately, this will become easier as you go along and professional conversations become more common place. Good luck!
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Edmond’s Answer

Hi Len,
I have been dealing with that same exact challenge for most of my career and all I can tell you is that you're overthinking it.

Remember that your replies or follow ups don't have to be perfect. Sentences don't have to be elaborate and/or use big words, complicated technical terms, etc. The simpler the better. Just try to be yourself and I am sure the other side would appreciate it. I am confident that's the case because I appreciate it when people whom I've met for the first time in an event and exchanged contacts reaches out to me later just says "Hi, it was nice to meet you at the conference".

Once you get over that initial hesitation you can then use the advice of others who responded to your question as well.

Best of luck!
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Seni’s Answer

You can manage your network by keeping in touch sometimes with people. For examples, you can send happy holidays emails, happy birthdays, or just sending emails to check on people, or even by calling people to ask them about work/family/ etc. Respond to emails and texts messages, from your network. Don't ignore people who are messaging you. I know that you feel like it is time consuming, but by responding to tests, emails, and talking to these folks make your network relationship stronger.

Good luck!
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