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What is the most stressful part of being a psychologist?
I'm aware that in the psychology field, you deal with a lot of people's stresses and problems, I'm curious to know what part of it stresses you out the most.
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Nathaniel’s Answer
From the question and its tags, I take it you are asking what is most stressful for a psychologist working as a therapist in particular. Don't forget that psychologists perform many other tasks which have different kinds of stresses: e.g., as a teacher, a test evaluator, an experimental scientist.
It has been my experience that most if not all of the stresses of offering therapy come from not maintaining good boundaries: for example, taking on the concerns of the patient as if they were yours, not theirs. D.W. Winnicott, the British child psychoanalyst, wrote a brilliant short book called Holding and Interpretation. Ninety percent of the work of a therapist, he reasoned was like a mother's holding of an infant, providing a sense of safety, security, continuity. The therapist holds her/his client not physically, but in attention, in caring, in memory. S/he needs to remember, however, that she is 'holding' not 'absorbing,' 'holding' not 'becoming.' No matter how much empathy, how much attention, how much memory the therapist provides, s/he must then remember to 'let go' when the client walks out the door, and one way to assist her/himself in this is through getting supervision from a peer group or more advanced therapist.
The flip side of this is the therapist not guarding what crosses the boundary from her/his side . A successful therapeutic relationship may feel like a parent-child interrelationship or even a friendship, but it only 'feels like': it isn't either. A failsafe I acquired in grad school is to scrutinize carefully what you want to say to the client, the interpretation, in Winnicott's scheme. Do you want to say it to your satisfy your own need, or is it information the client needs? I have found this question invaluable, especially together with Winnicott's emphasis that interpreting, while critical, is junior to holding.
A final stressor combines boundary-crossing aspects of both 'taking on' too much and 'giving out' too much; that is wanting more than the client wants, working harder than the client does. The therapist is only the guide, not the pilgrim. While s/he needs to do the work of offering good guidance and the caring that the guidance offered is appropriate and useful, the client has to chose the journey and undertake the work of it. The best way I have found to protect oneself from this kind of stress is to evaluate one's work by professional and ethical standards, not by client accomplishments or lack of them. Clearly if one's clients consistently fail to thrive, the therapist is failing ethically and/or professionally. If one practices high ethical and professional standards, however, clients will thrive, whatever that means to them.
It has been my experience that most if not all of the stresses of offering therapy come from not maintaining good boundaries: for example, taking on the concerns of the patient as if they were yours, not theirs. D.W. Winnicott, the British child psychoanalyst, wrote a brilliant short book called Holding and Interpretation. Ninety percent of the work of a therapist, he reasoned was like a mother's holding of an infant, providing a sense of safety, security, continuity. The therapist holds her/his client not physically, but in attention, in caring, in memory. S/he needs to remember, however, that she is 'holding' not 'absorbing,' 'holding' not 'becoming.' No matter how much empathy, how much attention, how much memory the therapist provides, s/he must then remember to 'let go' when the client walks out the door, and one way to assist her/himself in this is through getting supervision from a peer group or more advanced therapist.
The flip side of this is the therapist not guarding what crosses the boundary from her/his side . A successful therapeutic relationship may feel like a parent-child interrelationship or even a friendship, but it only 'feels like': it isn't either. A failsafe I acquired in grad school is to scrutinize carefully what you want to say to the client, the interpretation, in Winnicott's scheme. Do you want to say it to your satisfy your own need, or is it information the client needs? I have found this question invaluable, especially together with Winnicott's emphasis that interpreting, while critical, is junior to holding.
A final stressor combines boundary-crossing aspects of both 'taking on' too much and 'giving out' too much; that is wanting more than the client wants, working harder than the client does. The therapist is only the guide, not the pilgrim. While s/he needs to do the work of offering good guidance and the caring that the guidance offered is appropriate and useful, the client has to chose the journey and undertake the work of it. The best way I have found to protect oneself from this kind of stress is to evaluate one's work by professional and ethical standards, not by client accomplishments or lack of them. Clearly if one's clients consistently fail to thrive, the therapist is failing ethically and/or professionally. If one practices high ethical and professional standards, however, clients will thrive, whatever that means to them.
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mark’s Answer
Hello Victoria,
Nathaniel's answer is so amazingly comprehensive, I find it difficult to add much more other than my own experience as a practicing therapist. The aspects of practice I found most stressful had less to do with the therapy sessions themselves than they did with the accompanying paperwork, dealing with insurance companies, and managing the day-to-day workings of an individual business. The in-session aspects of the work have been well documented in Nathaniel's answer, and I agree with him (for the most part).
I would recommend you begin your career working with a group of practitioners or an agency that will help you manage the business side of the job. The less time spent on business management, the more time we have to see clients, focus on their treatment, consult with other professionals, and take care of ourselves. Working with a therapist of your own is also a great way to help process and alleviate stress.
I hope this contributes some useful information to you.
Best of luck!
Mark Vellucci
Nathaniel's answer is so amazingly comprehensive, I find it difficult to add much more other than my own experience as a practicing therapist. The aspects of practice I found most stressful had less to do with the therapy sessions themselves than they did with the accompanying paperwork, dealing with insurance companies, and managing the day-to-day workings of an individual business. The in-session aspects of the work have been well documented in Nathaniel's answer, and I agree with him (for the most part).
I would recommend you begin your career working with a group of practitioners or an agency that will help you manage the business side of the job. The less time spent on business management, the more time we have to see clients, focus on their treatment, consult with other professionals, and take care of ourselves. Working with a therapist of your own is also a great way to help process and alleviate stress.
I hope this contributes some useful information to you.
Best of luck!
Mark Vellucci