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How do you avoid Speaking negatively about yourself in interviews? Directly and indirectls

When it comes to interviews, I have trouble coming up with something good and positive to say about myself. With little experience in interviews, I find that in my practice answers, I subconsciously say something negative about myself, indirectly or directly. Now, I'm being more vigilant in what I say, but do you have any other tips for avoiding negative speech? If so, what are they? How do you boost your self-confidence to a balanced level?

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Subject: Career question for you

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Robert’s Answer

Avoiding negative self-talk in interviews is crucial to present yourself confidently and positively. Here are some tips to help you achieve that:

Self-awareness: Recognize your strengths and weaknesses beforehand. Focus on highlighting your strengths during the interview.

Practice positivity: Instead of saying, "I'm not very experienced in XYZ," say, "I have some experience in XYZ and am eager to learn and improve."

Prepare anecdotes: Share stories that showcase your accomplishments, problem-solving abilities, and contributions to previous roles.

Be confident, not arrogant: Confidence is good, but avoid coming across as overly boastful. Use specific examples to back up your claims.

Positive language: Use positive and action-oriented words, like "achieved," "collaborated," "contributed," and "successfully," to describe your experiences and achievements.

Avoid self-deprecation: Don't make jokes at your own expense or downplay your accomplishments. It diminishes your credibility.

Stay focused: Stick to the interviewer's questions and emphasize what you can bring to the company rather than dwelling on your limitations.

Practice with a friend: Conduct mock interviews with a friend or career counselor to get feedback on your communication style.

Visualization: Before the interview, visualize yourself confidently answering questions and leaving a positive impression.

Stay calm: Nervousness can lead to negative self-talk. Practice relaxation techniques to manage anxiety.

Remember, the interview is an opportunity to showcase your qualifications and potential. Maintaining a positive and confident demeanor can significantly improve your chances of success.
Thank you comment icon Thank you for your advice! Do you have any relaxation techniques that work for you / ones that you would recommend? Stephanie
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Jessica’s Answer

Great question- a few ideas on how to ensure that you're not speaking negatively about yourself during interviews, which is when you should show off the awesome strengths you have!

1. It's always easier for other people to tell you the great things you do than for you to recognize it within yourself; ask for feedback from people you're close to about your strengths
2. Practice, practice, practice! Doing mock interviews can help you feel more comfortable talking about yourself and all your accomplishments. The more you get the wording down, the more confident you'll feel being able to speak about these things when the time of the interview comes.
3. Frame negatives into positives as they're really growth/learning opportunities! Reframing is not only a useful approach for interviews, but also will help in shifting your mindset from areas you may perceive as a weakness to areas you're able to lean into to grow.
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Frank’s Answer

Preparation is important. Make a list of your experiences to talk about. If you don't have much work experience, include all other experiences as well, including extracurricular activities, sports, organizations outside of school, church activities, child/sibling/elder care, lawn care, hobbies, or anything else that you can take pride in sharing. When you don't have a lot of work experience, it's about sharing who you are as a person and how that would make you a good fit for the job. Try to stick to the facts of your experiences and accomplishments so you can avoid guessing whether they are positives or negatives for the particular job. All of your experiences and accomplishments are unique to you, after all, so there should not be anything negative in what you have to offer. It's up to the interviewer to decide how that compares to the other candidates.

I also recommend reading Dare to Lead by Brene Brown. There is some good content around self-talk. If you can realize the times you have negative self-talk and turn that into positive self-talk, it should then translate into positive answers in interviews.
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Hi Stephanie- Kudos to you for your self awareness on this topic. I’d offer a few thoughts on potential solutions—

1. Try to reframe your attitude and thoughts prior to the interview. Practice answers to the questions, do your research on the job, and qualifications, and “will” yourself even in a mirror by saying you’ve got this!

2. During the interview, if you find yourself lacking in the skill being asked about, or are unable to answer the question, try to pivot by saying something like, “I may not have that exact situation or scenario/skill, I do have experience in XXX, and there are qualities that are similar”.

Good luck!!
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Lidia’s Answer

Adopting a more optimistic outlook starts with the way you speak with yourself daily. The difference between viewing a glass as half empty or half full is all about perspective. It's the same glass, just seen in a different light. If you're asked about an area during an interview where your experience is limited, reflect on those experiences you consider minor. Use them to craft a unique response. Even a few hours of volunteering could be relevant to the job you're applying for. If you find it challenging to respond quickly to unexpected questions, don't rush yourself. Request the interviewer to clarify or expand on the question. Remember, you've got this!
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Gayatri’s Answer

Embrace each discussion with your vibrant, positive energy and remember to have a good time. It's essential to enjoy the process and not let the pressure weigh you down. Lower the stakes for yourself, and step in with the intention of truly having a blast. Approach it with the mindset that you're there to relish the conversation, viewing the interview as a mutual exploration of compatibility, driven by genuine curiosity about each other. This perspective will lead you to an enriching discussion. It's also a wonderful idea to get inspired by thought leaders like Brene Brown and implement some of their insights before stepping in.
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Ashesh’s Answer

Just be honest about yourself, i.e. be what you are, that way you don't have to think twice or worry about making up things.
Positive and/or Negative need not be work or professional related, it could be just personal about yourself, so just take a step back and think about things you are really good at and feel positive about, what are your strengths, etc. Then rate those and pick 3-4 that you feel can relate to your respective job interview and just say it gracefully. Give examples where your positive attitude or strengths have actually helped, preferably in a professional environment, if not in personal experience. It should be super casual and should come from within very gracefully. If not, then just keep writing specific points on paper and practice until you have a good handle and confidence to talk about it to anyone anytime.

And similarly, if asked about weakness or negative things, identify things where you need to improve and are working on it in a positive way. So you acknowledge such areas, and are working towards those in priority order and analyzing the root cause of those issues and eventually fix them completely, that way you convert your weakness into no longer a weakness and may be a strength overtime.
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Kevin’s Answer

Don't hesitate to discuss a perceived "weakness" during an interview - the interviewer is interested in your self-awareness. However, always frame it in a positive manner, as others have suggested. Instead of stating, "I get nervous when presenting," you could say, "I'm aware that I can feel a bit anxious when presenting a new topic. To tackle this, I practice deep breathing exercises, ensure I'm well-prepared, and rehearse in front of a mirror." This approach shows that (i) you're aware of your areas for improvement, (ii) you've developed strategies to manage them, and (iii) you're actively working on enhancing your skills.
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