5 answers
Theophile
Student
Huntington Beach, California
1
Question
Updated
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How do I make good friends with other engineering majors
My name is Theo, and I'm going into my freshman year at Cal Poly soon. I'm going into college with almost all of my general education done. So I'll be going into my major courses straight away in college. I know that engineers are less social than your average person, myself included. I was just wondering how I can make friends with them, because I'm a little nervous as to how to do so. Do I just walk up to whoever sits next to me in class? What if they turn out not to be a good person? I'd also like to make friends with other majors, but I'm going to be around engineering majors most of the time, so I'm not sure.
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5 answers
Karin P.
Lecturer, Academic Advisor, Career Coach, Mentor
1209
Answers
Göttingen, Lower Saxony, Germany
Updated
Karin’s Answer
Hi Theo,
I am not the most social person myself, but college is the best time in life to make good friends! You'll be in class with other people. Talk to the person sitting next to you. You'll have a lot of the same questions and problems as the other students. Ask for the notes if you missed a lecture. Ask for help with problem sets or compare homework solutions. Find a study group to work with. There will be group projects where you will need to work with other students too. Believe it or not, engineering is rarely a solo thing.
You can also get involved in activities outside of class, like sports or clubs. Will you be staying in the dorms? Meet the other folks staying in your dorm. Find out if there are any organized activities at the dorm. Ask someone if they want to grab lunch together. Find out what sports others are doing. San Luis Obispo is lovely. Certainly, there will be people going to the beach. Join them.
I hope this helps! All the best to you!
KP
I am not the most social person myself, but college is the best time in life to make good friends! You'll be in class with other people. Talk to the person sitting next to you. You'll have a lot of the same questions and problems as the other students. Ask for the notes if you missed a lecture. Ask for help with problem sets or compare homework solutions. Find a study group to work with. There will be group projects where you will need to work with other students too. Believe it or not, engineering is rarely a solo thing.
You can also get involved in activities outside of class, like sports or clubs. Will you be staying in the dorms? Meet the other folks staying in your dorm. Find out if there are any organized activities at the dorm. Ask someone if they want to grab lunch together. Find out what sports others are doing. San Luis Obispo is lovely. Certainly, there will be people going to the beach. Join them.
I hope this helps! All the best to you!
KP
William Vvuko
Retired engineer
233
Answers
Moyo, Northern Region
Updated
William’s Answer
Hi Theo,
Ability to work in a team is one of the critical skills we need to succeed in our careers.
Relationships within teams is influenced by team dynamics. Each time we join a new team, the people we find in such a team may react to our presence differently. Some may be more welcoming than others. Friendships tend to be influenced by common values and interests.
Trust is at the heart of lasting relationships. To develop it, we need to be consistent and reliable in our behaviours and actions. Honesty helps us to nurture it too. It sometimes requires putting the interest of the other before our own, being available for the other.
Assertiveness helps us to say NO, in a polite way, when we feel we are being unfairly taken advantage of.
Respect of privacy & boundaries is important in relationships.
Sometimes strong differences of opinion do occur, occasionally resulting in conflicts. Positive conflict is good for team dynamics as it tends to drive improvement - it has to be issue based e.g. challenging the status quo . Negative conflict has the potential to destroy relationships irreparably.
We need to be honest enough to apologize when we're in the wrong.
Self-control helps us to manage our impulsive excesses thus helping us to moderate our behaviour and actions.
Social competence, generally, enables us to be outgoing, engaging and empathetic.
For lasting relationships, we need to continuously improve our emotional intelligence (EQ).
Ability to work in a team is one of the critical skills we need to succeed in our careers.
Relationships within teams is influenced by team dynamics. Each time we join a new team, the people we find in such a team may react to our presence differently. Some may be more welcoming than others. Friendships tend to be influenced by common values and interests.
Trust is at the heart of lasting relationships. To develop it, we need to be consistent and reliable in our behaviours and actions. Honesty helps us to nurture it too. It sometimes requires putting the interest of the other before our own, being available for the other.
Assertiveness helps us to say NO, in a polite way, when we feel we are being unfairly taken advantage of.
Respect of privacy & boundaries is important in relationships.
Sometimes strong differences of opinion do occur, occasionally resulting in conflicts. Positive conflict is good for team dynamics as it tends to drive improvement - it has to be issue based e.g. challenging the status quo . Negative conflict has the potential to destroy relationships irreparably.
We need to be honest enough to apologize when we're in the wrong.
Self-control helps us to manage our impulsive excesses thus helping us to moderate our behaviour and actions.
Social competence, generally, enables us to be outgoing, engaging and empathetic.
For lasting relationships, we need to continuously improve our emotional intelligence (EQ).
Joselyn Alpízar
Industrial Engineer
1
Answer
Heredia, Heredia Province, Costa Rica
Updated
Joselyn’s Answer
Friendships often develop when we least expect them; by spending time with others who share similar interests and experiences. Having an engineering major in common creates natural opportunities to build relationships, especially when working together in shared spaces.
During your studies, you can organize study groups or help classmates in topics you are knowledgeable about. This not only strengthens your understanding but also helps you expand your network and will inevitably lead to new connections.
When I was in college, I made many friends by working together on final projects and going to lunch as a group. It is completely normal to feel intimidated about taking the first step, but simply talking to the person next to you can make a big difference.
If your university organizes extracurricular activities (student groups/clubs, cultural groups, career events, volunteering activities, etc), sign up and explore different groups, even if they are outside your major. These experiences are great opportunities to meet new people and strengthen your networking skills.
During your studies, you can organize study groups or help classmates in topics you are knowledgeable about. This not only strengthens your understanding but also helps you expand your network and will inevitably lead to new connections.
When I was in college, I made many friends by working together on final projects and going to lunch as a group. It is completely normal to feel intimidated about taking the first step, but simply talking to the person next to you can make a big difference.
If your university organizes extracurricular activities (student groups/clubs, cultural groups, career events, volunteering activities, etc), sign up and explore different groups, even if they are outside your major. These experiences are great opportunities to meet new people and strengthen your networking skills.
Vanessa Mandal
Medical Director
24
Answers
Rocklin
Updated
Vanessa’s Answer
For me friendships evolved with classes that put us in the same space. That gave opportunity for conversation before and after class. Share your challenges or tips for tackling class material. Identify people who may want to study together. Do outside activity together- any areas that you all enjoy. Mix with other disciplines. Team intelligence is important. Great ideas come from knowing other perspectives. Volunteering is a great way to meet people and build social capital
https://www.quipnex.com/blog/the-power-of-cross-disciplinary-teams-fostering-innovation-in-scientific-research
https://www.pdh-pro.com/pe-resources/9-engineering-charities-making-a-difference-in-the-world-today/
Vanessa recommends the following next steps:
Teklemuz Ayenew Tesfay
Software Engineer and Career Mentor
654
Answers
Ethiopia
Updated
Teklemuz Ayenew’s Answer
Friendships grow when you spend time together in places like classes, labs or group projects. Just being around each other and saying hello, joining talks, asking questions, and helping out can make everyone feel comfortable. It's not about trying too hard, but about being there and responding to each other. Trust builds up over time with these small, everyday interactions.
Being comfortable with yourself is also important. When you enjoy your own company, you can interact more naturally and don't need others to make you feel good. Confidence and a clear sense of personal values can make you more grounded and approachable, as people tend to respond positively to those who are self-assured without trying too hard. Don't worry if you haven't made close friends yet. Friendships take time and usually grow slowly. Being patient with this process is a big part of creating strong connections.
Being comfortable with yourself is also important. When you enjoy your own company, you can interact more naturally and don't need others to make you feel good. Confidence and a clear sense of personal values can make you more grounded and approachable, as people tend to respond positively to those who are self-assured without trying too hard. Don't worry if you haven't made close friends yet. Friendships take time and usually grow slowly. Being patient with this process is a big part of creating strong connections.